To 'Assinine' Laws

A lot has been said but very little done to address the striking imbalance between bat and ball in cricket. It is too easy to score at over a run a ball these days, especially on sub-continental flatbeds.

It is similar to the imbalance between defending and attacking in football - there, changing the offside rule so that there is atleast daylight between the striker and the last defender before he striker gets called offside would make a big difference to goalscoring.

How are bowlers expected to take wickets in 42 degree heat at Chepauk on a grassless flat track? Let them fiddle around with the ball a little bit, as long as its with their hands. Sure, lift the seam, what the hell? Bob Woolmer called law 43.2 an ass recently. Mike Selvey writing on the subject in the Guardian gives a few examples of 'ball tampering' incidents and allegations in the past:

Remember the old tale of a first-class English umpire, once no slouch himself as a seam bowler, who having inspected a ball with a seam that had been picked so hard it would have sliced carpaccio, threw it back to bowler with the comment that if he didn't get a five-for with it he wasn't worth a light. It was cricket's equivalent of driving at 80mph on the motorway.

Selvey does go on to suggest that 'tampering' only became an issue after the Pakistanis started getting reverse swing, starting with Sarfaraz Nawaz and Imran Khan in the 70s and 80s and then with Wasim and Waqar in the 90s, thereby putting a racial and maybe political spin on it. All possibly true, of course, but that is a topic which this blog is not at all about. We do not condone race and politics.

Andrew Miller writing in Cricinfo agrees that the 'Dark arts need to be brought into the light'. He argues, among other things, that what qualifies as ball tampering is often lost in nuance:

Pakistan's underlying grievances, however, stem from the double standards inherent in ball-tampering. As anyone who has ever played the game knows, a bit of spit and polish is perfectly acceptable, essential even, but a bit of scratch and scour ... well that can only be the devil's work.

Finally, the most vilified man in the incident - Darrell Hair - finds himself a supporter at long last in Harry Pearson writing in the Guardian blog. He takes particular exception to the "Mini-Hitler" accusations directed at Hair, emnating from Pakistan:

As to whether Hair is a "Mini-Hitler" all I can say is: I hope not. After all, the 53-year-old from North Sydney weighs 18 stones. If he is a miniature version of the fascist leader, then Hitler must have been even more of a colossus in reality than he was in his own fervid fantasies, standing atop the Reichstag swatting at allied aircraft like an unsavoury version of King Kong.

A Dream in a Broad Sense

While I attempt to keep this blog free of magic realism, this particular incident (or rather coinkidink) warrants publishing.

A couple of weeks or so ago during one of the tests between England and Pakistan, the TMS team on the BBC started talking during the tea interval about the Twenty20s cup which was in its final stages at that time. They mentioned Stuart Broad in particular, the tall 20 year old quickie who plays for Leicestershire and has had an impressive season, and whether or not it is too early to talk of him as an Ashes prospect for this winter. It was a very brief exchange and the subject was quickly changed, quite possibly because Blowers got distracted by sea gulls or the blue trams pulling into Old Trafford Station.

Fast-forward a couple of weeks to New York City and more specifically, to my bedroom between the hours of midnight and 8am starting last night. In the dream that filled the gap between those hours, a very tall bowler named Broad bowling in a street game at an undisclosed location - but most probably Melbourne, by the feel of it - gets extraordinary bounce from good length deliveries and takes several wickets in that innings including a hat-trick. For some reason, the passers-by on the street keep referring to that game as the Ashes.

The first thing I usually do after waking up every morning and checking my email is open the BBC sports section. To my shock when I did that today, there was a large article on the front page talking about the rise of Stuart Broad and it included bits of interviews with him and his father - former England batsman Chris Broad.

What is the point of this fable? That the seed of a thought was implanted in my brain via the media a couple of weeks ago and I had a dream about it yesterday. Just like any other normal person. And then it got published in the BBC this morning.

Where the Sun don't Shine

It is time people stopped being super critical of cricket boards and tournament organizers and gave them credit where it is due. This 'glass is half-empty' attitude is especially distressing in these difficult times, when one seeks inspiration, not spirit deflation. With that, ladies and gentlemen, I introduce to you the beautifully constructed shenanigans of the "ongoing" "tri-series" in Sri Lanka, which has proved once and for all that the Big Cheeses of all major cricket boards have elevated incompetence and skullduggery to an art form.

By organizing a tournament in the middle of a war-zone and worse still, in the middle of a monsoon season, sub-continental boards have proved yet again that the driving force for such events is potential television and advertising revenue and not preparation and conditioning time for major ICC events.

The last bit of competitive cricket the Indian team played was in early July in the West Indies. With the Champions trophy starting in early October, why not give the team a long and well deserved break till late August-early September, before calling them in for a one month conditioning camp culminating in two or three warm up games? Not a chance. A completely pointless series in SL had to be organized which meant that the players had to cut short a much needed rest and recuperation period to start preparing for it.

If a series had to be played at all -  and some people might argue the case for having a few international games under a team's belt before  a major tournament, then have it in a place like Sharjah or Dubai, where the pitches are similar to the sub-continent, but more importantly, where it is NOT RAINING CONTINUOUSLY right now. Of course, the bigwigs have decided on having another tri-series in Malaysia in mid-september. Again, not the smartest thing to do because of the weather there.

Well, here's to hoping we get to see the Indian team in action for a couple of games atleast, before the champions trophy.

A Farewell to 4-5-1?

One of the most painful sights from the World Cup was watching Steven Gerard and Frank Lampard tripping over each others' feet in a hilariously overcrowded midfield. Clearly Sven Goran Eriksson knows more about football than I do - which is why he was chosen for the England job and not I - but at times, even I could have told him what to do and that advice would have made a huge difference to England's chances. Here's an example:

Tactic 1: Play Gerard beside either Crouch or Rooney as the second striker -- that way, Lampard gets his freedom with Hargreaves playing as the holding midfielder.

Tactic 2: Start with Lampard on the bench and play two strikers - Crouch-Rooney or Crouch-Walcott, Rooney-Walcott, Crouch-Lennon, etc. Gerard plays his favoured midfield role and if he proves to be ineffective, swap him with Lampard in the second half.

So the problem with tactic 1 is that Sven didn't have the imagination for it and with #2, he didn't have the balls for it. That, in my opinion was the main reason for England's below par performance throughout the tournament.

The Steve McClaren era has begun with an unconvincing 4-0 friendly victory over a Greece team who were nothing short of shambolic in the first half. Which is somewhat enigmatic considering that most of the players on this team were part of the Euro 2004 winning side. The important thing for England, however, is that all four goals were scored with a 4-4-2 combination. I think that is the way ahead. 4-5-1 really needs to be done away with and it was one of the main reasons why the goals practically dried up for all the teams in the World Cup after the group stages.

 McClaren seems to have borrowed a leaf from Rafa Benitez' book and played Gerard on the right, in place of the axed Becks. It looked like a good move in this game, but the question it does bring up is, what happens now to the excellent Aaron Lennon?